I met a friend for dinner the other day. She seemed a little down, not her usual self. Over the course of our dinner, she shared with me that her business had hit a bit of a rough patch.  

She explained that normally she excelled at pitch presentations. She usually acquired new clients relatively easily. Except lately she hadn’t been finding much success, and she felt her confidence waning. 

As I listened to her, I felt a lot of empathy. It’s hard not to lose confidence when things aren’t working out. I’ve struggled with this too. We all have.

Often when we experience a setback or a disappointment, we take it personally. We think there is a flaw in ourselves.

However, upon closer analysis, there likely was something about the circumstances or context that caused the failure. It is also likely that we could have met with much more success if we had just made one or two changes. 

Looking at the problem, using author Jay Shetty’s F.A.S.T. approach, is one way to do this.  

Shetty says that when we experience failure, it is usually due to the wrong Fit, the wrong Approach, the wrong Skill Set or the wrong Timing. Rather than personalizing a failure, it is better to look at the situation using the F.A.S.T. approach to drill down to the root cause and determine a plan forward. 

I could have used this advice earlier in my career. 

When I was in academia, I sent out articles, hoping they would be published. Sometimes the manuscript got snapped up. But most times it would take months, even years before it was accepted, often after many rejections. It really took a toll on my confidence. However, I do remember a professor telling me that my paper was good and that it mostly came down to finding the right publisher who wanted to publish my research at that particular time. Fit and Timing were the keys here. 

In my business I’ve also been trying to drill down to determine when and why services are purchased. Sometimes 30% of workshop attendees buy courses or services after attending. Sometimes only 3% do. Fit or Timing could be the reason. Clients buy when they experience a need. They may be attending workshops to gain preliminary information, but they aren’t buying more services because they aren’t ready. Or perhaps it is my sales approach? Maybe I’m not too soft with my sell. Or maybe I didn’t provide the skills they hoped to learn?

It can be a challenge to determine the exact reason for any so-called failure, but this F.A.S.T. approach is one way to dissect any problem, without taking it personally. It creates distance, which helps with analysis. 

I shared the F.A.S.T. approach with my friend, and it seemed to resonate with her.  

She liked how the F.A.S.T. system categorizes problems. It helps build more awareness of where things broke down and provides an idea of how to start fixing them.  

I like how it helps me rethink my own failures in a way that I can “move past rejection and remain positive about the future,” as Shetty says.  

This is something we could all benefit from. 

So, as a challenge this week, I invite you to think about a past failure. Analyze what happened. Was it the wrong fit, approach, skillset, or timing? Then you can determine what can be done to move forward in a more positive direction. 

Using the F.A.S.T. approach helps us remember that we can always learn and improve our skills or handle a similar situation differently in the future.  

 Best wishes, Lauren